Time has a way of teaching you that nothing is permanent. Sometimes it feels like things will last endlessly when you get used to having people around for a long time but eventually people change, seasons change and nothing stays the same forever.
Investing time and emotion in another person, whether it is a friend or lover takes a lot of dedication, and many times you might expect people to love you in the same way that you love them. When that doesn’t happen and bonds between people break, it can be devastating. One mistake or miscommunication can sometimes end a longterm friendship or relationship. Ties that have been built can break overnight. As hard as it is to accept. this a part of life. People will always come and go, and the doors between people are always constantly revolving. Accepting that this is a part of life can give you comfort in knowing that it isn’t something that you did, but that this is an experience that many before us have faced, and people after us will face. Nothing in life is permanent in life including the people who you love.
I have experienced more losses than you can imagine. I am no stranger to the experience of change and disappointment. Accepting the fluctuations in life was not an easy process for me, and it may not be easy for you, but with time it will become easier. Remember that you are not alone in this, this experience is apart of the foundation of humankind.
When people leave your life, it leaves a gaping hole in parts of your existence. The routine that you built with your best friend or partner has completely changed, and it leaves a strong feeling of discomfort with the quiet that surrounds you. Most people do not like to be alone, and many try to run from this feeling of discomfort. I was one of those people, I’m right there with you. I understand. I have reached a point where I know that its ok to be alone. Fearing loneliness is a primal fear that we all have to conquer if we want to be happy. At one point in my life, if I wasn’t hanging out with my friends, or if I didn’t have a date lined up with my boyfriend, I would feel really lonely. Things have changed a great deal for me since then and now I actually enjoy my time alone.
Going for a long drive and enjoying the silence is an enriching experience to me. I am fairly introverted, so I usually need alone time to recharge, but the discomfort in not having a partner there no longer causes an ache in my heart. The space of solitude that comes from time to time in my life has become a place of enjoyment, an opportunity to get closer to myself, and to be highly creative.
Pick up the hobby that you have been neglecting, or engage in some serious self-care in these times. Eventually new people will come into your life, and when they do, you will be a new, revitalized person. Engage in your space of solitude, reinvigorate your soul, and become the best version of you possible!